Vote for the MOM Party!

Okay, I just couldn't help myself....I'm going to write a little bit about politics. Well, sort of.

I am a registered independent. I just haven't found a major political party yet that I can really, fully get behind. Politicians are all liars and hypocrites - you just can't represent any large group of people without pandering to somebody. But I will say that this year's election has got me thinking...

For many years, I've thought that a female president *could* do wonders for this country. I say *could* because it would, of course, depend on the woman. For example, I would never have voted for Hillary - putting aside my personal opinion that her political ambitions appear to be a maniacal, egotistical obsession for absolute power. I simply don't agree that it takes a village and socialist healthcare to raise my children. I can beat them into submission and send them to bed until they stop whining without governmental assistance, thank you very much. But I digress....

I'm not really going to espouse my views of political platforms and platitudes. Instead, I'm going to offer you an alternative:

The Maternal Organization Management (MOM) Party

Slogan: "Don't Make Us Come Over There"

Party Colors: Pink and "baby-poo" Brown

Party Mascot: "Minnie Merlot" the wine bottle of peace

Platform:
RESPONSIBILITY. Take responsibility for yourself, your actions and your future. You're a big boy/girl now - it's time to stop expecting the government to support you and clean up your messes.

HONESTY. Always the best policy. Even when it hurts. Like when I told you that new dress really over-emphasized the junk in your trunk. Or even when it's hard to admit we all rushed headlong into a war with no real plan for an endgame. But we can't just "pull out." Now we have to take responsibility for the offensive we began and help a foreign country regain a dignity long lost. It's not the easy road, but it's the right thing to do.

INTEGRITY. You know your Mama taught you right from wrong. Now stand up for it.

RESPECT. Respect is earned - it is not a birthright. Respect yourself. Respect others. Respect the boundaries, belongings and opinions of others. Your mother taught you manners. Use them. And when you choose to disrespect - whether it be the smallest slander or an international terrorist act, just know that we MOMS brought you into this world, and we can take you right back out if you can't learn how to behave like a human and not an animal.

HEALTHCARE: MOMs will wrest control of national healthcare from the money-hungry insurance industry and give that control back to the individual doctors and patients. Your care should be between you and your doctor. Not the insurance company conglomerates and the Federal government. But speaking of the government, here's something it should focus on:

IMMIGRATION: Close the borders. Summarily deport all illegal aliens from U.S. soil. There have been laws on the books for hundreds of years that provide for the legal immigration and naturalization of immigrants. Get in line, follow the process, learn the language, get a job, and provide for your family. Only after you have become a U.S. citizen and have begun financially supporting the social services can you reap the benefits of them.

SOCIAL SERVICES: MOMs will cut the purse strings on those who would live off the charity of others. Earn your living and earn our respect and support. Able-bodied persons must perform community service according to their abilities in order to be eligible for Welfare and other social support. Only those physically or mentally unable to perform any small task will live off the charity of the American taxpayers. Everyone will be expected to earn their way, to the best of their ability.

ECONOMY: Use the surplus of funds diverted from supporting illegal aliens and third-generation Welfare recipients to pay down the national deficit. MOMs will also take a strong stance on foreign aid - we'll "take care of our own, first." And when we are able, we will absolutely aid our allied countries, who have earned our support and respect.

Yes, the MOM party is tough. But America and her current government are like a wayward child - we just need a firm hand to guide us back to the simple goodness of Mom's teachings. So "do what we say, and don't make us come over there."

We are the Maternal Organization Management (MOM) Party. And we approved this message.